The Athens Academy Upper School Dress Code, as written by Mr. Statchura

Upper School Dress Code

 
Boys
Tops:
* Collared or Turtleneck shirts, ironed and looking good for the ladies.-- tucked in because Mr. Snead wants you to.
* Sweatshirts or sweaters may be worn over a dress-code-conforming shirt. Unless you are support my least favorite sports team, then it must be burned.
Bottoms:
* Dress shorts with a belt (We don’t need your pants falling down, nobody wants to see that.)-- all must be no shorter than two inches above the knee. Because you never know someone may come around with a ruler and check that they are the right length.
* Slacks or jeans with a belt as appropriate. Make sure they are well fitting too, we all don’t want to look like Justin Bieber in his skinny jeans.
Shoes:
* Sneakers, tennis or running shoes. Be prepared, we might be running around campus for class today.
* Dress shoes; just in case you are going to a dance class with interact after school.
* Birkenstock-Style sandals, sorry those really aren't in style anymore, please try to refrain from wearing them.
* Dress sandals, we aren’t old men here, I want to try to stay as close to being young again as I can.
* Leather sandals-- Slip-on or lace-up. Slip on, I can do that, but who is a man and has time to lace up his sandals. (or even know how to do that)
Hair:
* Neat and well groomed, well this applies to some people, others just let theirs grow long and free.
* Cleanly shaven, with sideburns not extending below the lower edge of the ear opening. Otherwise we will kidnap you on your way to class and force you to shave your facial hair.
Hats:
* Outdoors only, unless Coach Gunn wants to wear his safari hat around school.

Girls

Tops:

*Collard, turtleneck or modest scoop, v-neck, or crewneck knit shirts—tucked in as appropriate. So basically anything you want as long as no one can see anything they don’t need too.

* Sweatshirts or sweaters may be worn over a dress-code-conforming shirt. No, but really if I don’t like that team, that jacket should be burned and never seen or worn again.

Bottoms:

*Dress shorts or skorts—all must be no shorter that two inches above the knee. I know no one wears skorts, but we aren’t at the fair when we were shorts here.

* Slacks or jeans. Ladies it is time to start pulling out your best pant suits and jeans for the fall and winter.

* Dresses, jumpers, or skirts—all must be no shorter than two inches above the knee. No one checks or cares, just as long as we can’t see your undergarments we are good.

* Leggings or shorts may be worn under a dress-code-conforming dress, jumper or skirt. Well everyone now knows that leggings are pants, who wants to wear them under a dress anymore?

Shoes:

*Sneakers, tennis or running shoes. Yes girls, we are not back in middle school where that in socially acceptable. If you wear any other sneakers than vans with jeans, than you might not have any friends at lunch.

*Dress shoes. Really? Why not wear heels or wedges everyday and fall flat on your face in front of the cute guy walking across the bridge.

*Birkenstock sandals, don’t go stealing your grandmothers shoes, you may borrow your friends clothes, but those things are horrible and they should just stay in her closet.

* Dress sandals, aren’t those the same thing as dress shoes?

* Leather sandals—slip-on or lace-up, you guys have so much time in the morning, why not look even better with a cute pair of sandals, as long as they are leather.

Hair:

*Neat and well groomed, with all the free time you guys have, you should go get it done every week.

Hats:

Outdoors only, do you girls even wear hats anymore?

Not allowed for boys or girls

*Camouflage or military attire, we aren’t holding guns or going into a battle right now, safe that for at home.

*Dresses, skirts, skort or short bottom shorter than two inches above the knee, basically as long as we don’t see what we don’t want to see everything is alright.

*Athletic pants or shorts, we want to look good not sloppy and disgusting.

*Midriff, cleavage, belly or lower back exposure, we are not at a strip club, please keep your clothes on.

*Objective words, slogans, pictures, or symbols, we aren’t in public school people.

*T-shirts, halter tops, tank tops, spaghetti strap tops or strapless tops, basically we don’t want to see your shoulders.

*Extreme haircuts, here we only want to look are best even our hair.

* Piercings other than ears, that would be cool but no one needs to see that at school.

Basically to wrap it all up, we want to look our best that we can, even if some of these rules seem ridiculous.