How to Check Yourself Out in Public

Scenario Number 1: You’re having a conversation with your friend and she keeps touching and messing with her nose. You’re not sure if she’s giving you a sign or if she just likes to constantly touch her nose. You then become very uncomfortable with the conversation and have to awkwardly do the “nose graze”. Pretend that your nose itches and check to make sure nothing is out of the ordinary. Remember, the key is to graze the front of the nostrils.

Scenarios Number 2: When the nose graze fails and you still feel uncomfortable, use the camera on your iPhone to double check.

Scenario Number 3: You wake up late one day for school and forget to put on the most important thing. Deodorant. Usually people who forget to put it on forget that they don’t have any on and they lift up their arms more than usual.  That’s probably because they are sweating more than usual. To make sure you do not have body odor, slowly lift your arms like you are stretching and turn your head slightly to the left or the right to get a whiff. If you smell like Old Spice or Cherry Blossom, you’re in the clear. If not, please do everyone a favor and get that figured out.

Scenario Number 4: After a nice lunch you would probably want to check if you have anything in your teeth. No one wants to talk to someone that has a piece of spinach or chocolate on their teeth. If you have water, take a swig and swoosh it around. That usually does the job, but if you have to get your fingers dirty just slowly put your hand up to your lips and take your index finger to pick between the each tooth. Usually you would do this discreetly.

Scenario Number 5: If you ripped your pants, everyone probably saw it. Therefore, everyone basically just checked you out in public.

The art to checking yourself out in public is very hard to master. You have to learn how to be discreet and patient. Patient is the key because you have to wait for the right moment or else you’ll get caught and that’s just embarrassing.